Home › What to say › Family or a friend (I'm asking)
Message asking family or a friend for a loan: text and email generator
Name the amount and the date you'll pay it back, make it easy to say no, and write it down if they say yes.
The full guide, with what to expect and what to do next: How to ask family for money.
Tips before you ask
- Ask for a specific amount and a specific repayment date. Vague asks are harder to say yes to.
- Offer to write it down. A short written agreement protects the relationship as much as the money.
- If you can't pay back on time, tell them before the date, not after.
Example: ask to borrow money
A worked example in the warm tone. Fill in the form above to get your own, in the tone you choose.
What to say
Ask directly and early. Say the exact amount and the date you'll pay it back, and make it easy to say no.
Hi Sam, can I ask you something a bit awkward?
I had an unexpected medical bill.
I'm short this month, and I wondered if you could lend me $200. I'd pay it all back by Friday, November 20.
I'm happy to write it down so we both know what we agreed.
It's completely fine to say no. I'll understand.
If they say no
Ask to borrow money
- Thank them, and mean it. Asking didn't cost you the relationship; pushing would.
- Ask whether a smaller amount would be possible, once, and then drop it.
- See cheaper options before a cash advance: /cheaper-alternatives/
More time to repay them
- Offer part now and the rest on the new date.
- Ask what date would work for them, and only agree to one you can keep.
- Write down the new agreement and send it to them, so you both have it.
These are templates for general information, not legal or tax advice, and not a substitute for the advice of an attorney. You send every message yourself; we never contact anyone on your behalf.