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Reply when someone asks to borrow money: message generator
How to say no kindly, or yes with clear conditions, without damaging the relationship.
The full guide, with what to expect and what to do next: How to say no when someone asks to borrow money.
Tips before you ask
- Only lend what you could afford never to see again.
- Decide before you talk. A 'let me think about it' that turns into no a week later is harder than a kind no now.
- If you say yes, write down both names, the amount, the dates and what happens if a payment is missed.
Example: say no
A worked example in the warm tone. Fill in the form above to get your own, in the tone you choose.
What to say
Say no clearly and early. You don't owe a long reason, and a vague 'maybe' is harder on both of you.
Sam, thank you for trusting me enough to ask.
I've thought about it, and I can't lend you $500.
My own budget is tight right now.
I hope you know it's not about you. Is there another way I can help, like looking at options together?
If they say no
Say no
- If they push, repeat the same answer, kindly. You don't need a new reason.
- If you want to help in another way: point them to cheaper options (/cheaper-alternatives/) or help them make a call.
Say yes, with conditions
- If they can't agree to a date, you can lend a smaller amount, or give a smaller amount as a gift instead.
- Write the terms down: both names, the amount, the dates and what happens if a payment is missed.
These are templates for general information, not legal or tax advice, and not a substitute for the advice of an attorney. You send every message yourself; we never contact anyone on your behalf.